Motherhood Tag Q + A
I thought I would do a wee bit of a Questions and Answers post today, seeing as I’m feeling all motivated and ready to get this whole blogging thing sorted. I found 20 “Mom Tag” questions online so I’ll jump right in and start answering them!
How old were you when you had your first child?
I was 23 when I gave birth to River. I don’t think I’m young, actually I feel pretty old and worn out lol but I feel like a lot of people are a bit judgy judgy and look at me like I’m too young to be a mum sometimes. Ah well, their problem!
What was the hardest thing about being pregnant for 9 months?
Well, where do I start! Gotta say I was not one of those radiant glowing ladies! Pregnancy is hard! The main thing was morning sickness. I worked in a deli and started at 6am (more like 6:30 by the time I finished being sick errrrrry day) and I was just a mess . I was sooooo grumpy for nine months and cried a lot and had this sciatica spasm thing in my leg. On top of that I had only just actually settled down from like 4 years of being a bit of nomad, travelling around the world, so it was this big adjustment and I was like aaaaaargh I’m not ready for a baby!!! I threw a couple of dinners on the ground and a cup of chamomile tea at my husband too whoops! Hormones oh joy
Also, I did. not. like. strangers touching my belly. Or asking when I was due. Or telling me I had triplets in there.
Can you think of any good things you enjoyed during those 9 months?
My hair grew really fast.
No actually, it wasn’t all bad at all. I had life growing inside me. It’s a miracle, literally. Once I finished work I actually really enjoyed being with my bump and talking to her and feeling her move inside me.
In your opinion, were all the things you heard about childbirth accurate or way off.
I’m going to do a post on my birth story actually because the thing is that I loved giving birth and I don’t think there are enough positive birth stories out there. I mean, I did have gas and air or laughing gas, but I didn’t have an epidural or anything else. I tried to block out any negative stories although pretty much everybody wanted to tell me about their horrific birth stories right before I was about to give birth (yeah thanks so much.. not!)
My mum was pretty much the only person I know who was like yeah I love giving birth. So I held onto that.
Um also, nobody tells you that it’s normal to poop during birth- which now I know it is! I really wish I had known that it was completely normal because I was so embarrassed and was too busy worrying about pooping and it kind of distracted me from the labour and my techniques of visualising and focusing the pain. So yeah, don’t be worried if you poop! It’s alllll gooooood.
Would you have handled childbirth differently if you could re-do it?
What would be your advice for someone who is about to have a baby?
Don’t put pressure on yourself or your baby with expectations, especially around sleep. I have been very flexible around bedtimes with my 6 mo and it’s worked out perfect for us. In the beginning she slept from 3am until noon and that worked perfect for us. We tried getting her to sleep at a “normal time” and it was so stressful. It stressed me out. It stressed my husband out. Most importantly, it stressed River out. She’s all like yo! I don’t wanna sleep right now! I want booby give me booby! I want to look around at my big new world!
Some nights I would sleep for 45 minutes. But I had no choice but to go ok thats cool tomorrow we will drink coffee and watch Netflix. I might not cook dinner or vacuum tomorrow but that’s cool.
Recently River cried whenever I put her in bed. Instead of stressing I just put up the foot rest on the arm chair and we sleep on the arm chair for a few hours together. I get sleep, she gets sleep so it’s all G. I know so many parents would be like wtf noooooo what are you doing???
I’m doing what works for us.
What has been the hardest thing about being a mom?
River just yanked my hair right then and that was pretty fucking hard.
No but really, loving somebody so much. I love her so much that it physically hurts me so much whenever I think of something ever happening to her that would make her sad or feel lost or lonely or anything. It’s really hard loving her so much actually.
I thought that the hardest thing would be that it is no longer easy for me to wonder aimlessly around the world, getting stoned and drinking wine. It’s like a little switch went off in my head and now I’m like nope! Got to make a home! Got to keep this little chicken safe. Also I haven’t even wanted a joint or a glass of wine.
I wrote a wee post about anxiety as a mother here.
What has been the most rewarding thing about being a mom?
I have the ability to make River happy. I can ease her stresses and help her through learning about this big wide world.
Sounds cheesy AF but there really is nothing more rewarding than that little girl giggling at me pretending to be a rocket ship in my jammies. Or feeling her calm down when she is stressed as she lets herself drift off to sleep in my warm squashy arms.
What was the most surprising thing you discovered about being a mom?
That I’m content. Didn’t think it was possible for me to be satisfied with a “normal” life, but I love waking up in the morning knowing that I get to chill with my little homie.
What is the best memory you have involving your child?
This is a tricky one. She is growing so fast and there are so many highlights of this journey. I find joy in every day. Every day is a bit hard but also a bit beautiful too.
What was the most exciting milestone?
What is the worst thing your child has ever done?
Sneezed mashy banana in my face hahahahaha nah she could never do wrong she is my little angel
What habit did you wish your child didn’t have?
What kind of question is this lol? Pass that shiiiit
What habit of theirs makes you most proud?
She pokes her tongue out and it looks so cute hehe
Do you share any similarities with your child (both Physical and Personality)?
River has got a pretty big personality! And the attitude to match! She loves singing like me (even though I sound like a drowning cat!) She also is a wee chatterbox and I think that’s because she spends 24/7 with me just talking shit with her.
She also has lots and lots of dark hair but I think that comes from her daddy. She has my chubby legs lol
Where would you like your child to be in 10 years?
What is something that having a child has taught you?
It’s ok to live a normal life. Every day has something special in it. I don’t have to be stoned on a rooftop in Marrakech to feel happy and I don’t have to be pushing life to the absolute limits to be excited. It’s a pretty sweet feeling.
Did you imagine that you’d be a mom at the age that you became a mom?
Not really. I thought I might get pregnant at some point but I didn’t think I would be married and have a wee family. I was tired and I had lived a little bit too much life in a short amount of time. I prayed for a rest, and in a way River is my little calm in the storm and she couldn’t have come at a better time.
Describe your child in a single sentence?
She is a manifestation of pure beauty and I LOVE HER SO MUCH!
How have you changed as a person since becoming a mom?
I’m so much more stable and grounded. I have purpose now which in turn gives me a sense of self. I do not need to do wild shit to feel like I’m doing something with my life. I’m a mummy!
I would love to get to know you all! Please share with me some posts about you in the comments below!